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Jason and Molly on why love on The Bachelor/ette fails

"Episode 904" - Desiree meets 11 of her guys at Boardwalk Hall - the birthplace of the Miss America Competition. (ABC)

Why is that more couples on The Bachelor don’t end up happily ever after, like Molly and Jason Mesnick? Maybe it’s because the show isn’t set up to make matches, but to make money. Or maybe it’s because these people are complete strangers following the finale.

We’re still waiting to see which lucky man bachelorette Desiree chooses and whether or not Sean and Catherine, of the latest Bachelor, will really tie the knot. How many couples have actually withstood the test of time – only four. Only two, the Mesnicks and Trista and Ryan,
have children.

But isn’t it like shooting fish in a barrel with all those options? Jason and Molly agree one of the biggest problems is you don’t really spend a lot of time together before the show ends.

Molly says you spend about seven weeks filming the show, but you really only spend a couple days total together. And she says the only real time off camera is when the couple is traveling between locations or switching out the lighting.

Those off camera moments are pretty rare because producers don’t want to miss something good.

“When you’re on camera, you’re not allowed to have conversations about real life, the important stuff,” says Molly. They can’t talk about music, what car they drive, what they like for dinner, or details about their careers.

“After it’s all said and done, the fact is, you don’t know the person you picked at the end of the show,” says Jason. ‘Oh, I didn’t know you liked country and you’re a serial killer! I should have asked.”

For most couples, they start over. And then when they start spending time together, they realize, “oh I don’t like this person, this person isn’t compatible with me,” says Molly.

Of course, Jason and Molly are one of the lucky few couples who’ve stood the test of time and even have a little bundle of joy as proof. But it wasn’t without a hurdle. Let’s not forget, Jason dumped Molly on national TV for Melissa Rycroft and then decided she wasn’t right for him.

After the show ends, the Mesnicks say the show flies the couple to ‘secret houses’ in Los Angeles so they can get to know each other. They don’t even have access to a car, which was a real problem for Molly and Jason their first weekend. Let’s just say there was a medical emergency that landed Jason in the hospital. The show’s producers requested Molly hide in the house so the EMTs wouldn’t see her and spill the beans before the season finale aired.

The Mesnicks agree another reason it’s difficult to fall in love on the show is the dates. Scaling buildings and traversing glaciers isn’t exactly good for conversation.

Jason says he’s not sure if bungee jumping or skydiving increases sexual energy, but all that adrenaline might create false feelings.

Before you even get to the dates, you might need a group of people who really want to fall in love.

“What makes the show go round is having 20 crazies and five good ones, plus or minus,” says Jason. “If they really wanted love to happen, they’d alter
that number a bit.”

Even if Jason knew which women were his top three in the first hour, the show must go on. The Bachelor has to give ‘the crazies’ enough face time to boost ratings.

Molly admits she only went to the casting call to support her friend, who really wanted to be on the show. She thinks the producers might have been interested in her because she was confident and didn’t care whether she got a call back. Plus, a little alcohol didn’t hurt either.

The Mesnick’s podcast, This IS Reality, is available anytime ON DEMAND at

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