We have come to the time of year when we erect a psychological wall, hiding the imperfections of the previous year from view – so we can look ahead at the New Year as an untouched canvas upon which we can paint a new and vastly improved version of ourselves.
Which typically means a thinner version of ourselves because according to a study by the University of Scranton, the number one New Year’s Resolution for 2014 is the same as the number one resolution every other year which is what, audience?
Yes, lose weight. Don’t sound so enthusiastic.
Getting organized is second, spending less money is number three, followed by enjoying life, staying fit, learning something exciting, quitting smoking – which is down to number seven – helping others achieve their dreams, falling in love, and number ten, spending more time with family.
But if you find those too cliched, here are some others courtesy of various people who posted them on YouTube …
“First on my list is not to stress myself out. Other people don’t really stress me out I just stress out myself because …”
This woman goes on for seven more minutes. “And you know what the problem is? Guys.”
Oh, tell me about it.
Here’s Josh, whose resolution is to make more videos of himself.
“And I want to make short films and I never did any of it this year – is make more videos.
Because there are only about 16 billion on YouTube already.
And here’s a young lady who calls herself Superwoman and I think you’ll understand why.
“In 2014, my nails are going to look fierce – like it’s Halloween and my nails are dressing as Beyonce.”
So I hope that gives you some ideas.
By the way, experts say the key to achieving your resolution is to break it into steps – like maybe bring your nails first to a Lady Gaga level, then Miley Cyrus, before going full Beyonce.