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Election eve is here. Dave Ross was inspired to write a poem. (AP Photo/file)

Election eve poem

BY Dave Ross  on November 5, 2012 @ 7:49 am (Updated: 8:53 am - 11/5/12 )

MyNorthwest's Election Night: Listen, watch, and get live results

There's really nothing more to say we haven't heard before except that here it is - Election Eve. That magical night when the Great Ballot goes house to house turning undecided voters into little red people and little blue people.

It's your last chance to figure it out and what better way to get in the mood than for me to read to you that beloved election season classic, The Night Before Tuesday.

The night before Tuesday; and in every house Each likely voter sits down with their spouse. The kids are asleep, but emit quiet screams As that day's attack ads poison their dreams.

You hear them scream 'daddy,' you hear them scream 'mommy:'

"I'm tired of Bronco Bama and Mitt Romney."

So momma with her pencil and I with my pen Sat down with our ballots to try this again. What facts are we missing? What more do we need? Another debate? A little more weed?

It costs one billion dollars to choose this one guy! One billion dollars - and what does it buy? You CAN put Commander in Chief on your bio, But everyone with a phone hates your guts in Ohio.

We've heard every speech, we've all been bored stiff Since either choice leads to the same fiscal cliff And so I voted RED, and she voted BLUE... And we climbed into bed, and made love 'til two.

So drink and be merry, and be of good cheer!

That most sacred day has begun to draw near

We've reached that most wonderful time of the year: When the ads, and it's voice, will all disappear.

Dave Ross, KIRO Radio Talk Show Host
Dave Ross is co-host of The Ross & Burbank Show on KIRO Radio (weekdays 9-Noon) and never too far from the spotlight.
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Comments (3)


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  • Chuck Gould wrote...
    Or....
    November 5, 2012 7:48 am
    ‘Twas the night before polling

    Across the US

    We all sat dismayed

    As we surveyed the mess

    We read bumper stickers

    And skimmed through the news

    Confused by brash lies about opposite views.

    Relentless as beagles the canvassers came

    To sniff out undecideds and list them by name

    To the top of the door, piled up high on the wall

    Are reams of campaign stuff dropped off by them all.

    Behind or ahead, campaigners abound

    Making bold promises to everyone found

    “Low taxes? No taxes! And good paying work!

    Oppose my opponent, the guy’s just a jerk.”

    Come morning we’ll vote

    To decide who is boss

    But regardless who wins

    It’s America’s loss.

    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • ron prevost wrote...
    a much better rendition, Chuck.
    November 5, 2012 8:32 am
    I think Dave is slipping in his old age.
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • Rick W7PSK wrote...
    Two Thumbs Up Chuck
    November 5, 2012 11:05 am
    Well Done
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }