Mr. Bean Goes To The Next Caller
Nov 21, 2014, 12:42 PM | Updated: Nov 28, 2014, 8:53 am
During my nine months as a fugitive in 1993 I lived in San Diego. I couldn’t have contact with people I already knew so I started calling an LA based sports radio talk show nightly. I made a few jokes and got to know the hosts of Too Much Show, Steve Mason and Rick Schwartz. They gave me the studio line so I could call whenever I had a “bit.” I met them at a Padres game listener event and we hit it off. So much so that when one of them had to take a night off on late notice they called me in to cohost the show.
As a broadcast major and sports fan this should have been a dream come true. But given the circumstances it was actually sad. I was using a fake name and backstory, doing drugs at a life threatening level, and still robbing banks all over the southwest. When the show was over I decided to get clean and turn myself in. Nothing good and real in my life could happen until I did this. The decision wasn’t hard, but the process would be formidable.
Seven years later, in 2000, I had done my time and was still on probation when a friend called me from LA. He said that Kevin & Bean were auditioning for a new “sports correspondent.” Dave had somehow gotten word to them about me and they were interested in giving me one of the audition slots. I got in touch with the producer who asked me to fax the LA sports and media articles about my role on XTRA-AM from back in 1993. I did and got word that they would be calling me to do my thing the next morning.
I stayed up all night and wrote jokes about everything that happened in sports. I had at least six or seven minutes of material I thought showed that I had the chops to do comedy. They called right on time and we talked for 10-15 minutes, all about my criminal past. They could not have been a nicer pair of gentlemen, but we didn’t do any sports talk. There was no callback. Just my friend Dave telling me a couple weeks later that someone else was doing the job.
The lesson here is follow your dream. And if it doesn’t work out after a few days just disappear into the restaurant industry for the rest of your life.
My “government” is Mike Frizzell. Friend me on Facebook where I post pictures of my elaborate tattoos paid for with your child support money. Follow me @drewmcfrizz on Twitter. Check out Takedown Podcast’s Facebook page where Bill Cosby faces stunning new rap allegations.