The deadline for passing some kind of budget to keep the federal government running is now 11 days away. But the Speaker of the House says there's nothing to worry about here.
"There should be no conversation about shutting the government down. Our goal here is to cut spending and to protect the American people from Obamacare. There is no interest in our part of shutting the government down," said Speaker of the House John Boehner. "Thanks."
But you see, you're attaching - to the bill that must be passed to keep the government running - an amendment that torpedoes the president's Affordable Care Act. And you're sending it to a Senate run by Democrats.
"I'm not going to predict what the Senate is going to do or not do," said Boehner.
No, you can never tell with those Senate Democrats. They're such inscrutable tight-lipped people when it comes to Republicans.
"House Republicans are like Custer." Especially Chuck Schumer. You can never figure out what that guy's thinking.
"Stop these zealots in your party from driving our economy over a cliff ..."
His rhetoric is so subtle.
"...with this insane plan."
Although, it sounds to me like he might be a no.
And speaking on behalf of the listening audience, if you guys really are going to run the same plot every two years, at least mix it up.
Maybe instead of the Republicans attaching the repeal of Obamacare to the budget, the Democrats could attach the repeal of the Second Amendment to the budget.
Then we could go back and forth, linking the budget to the Keystone Pipeline, school prayer, global warming, legalized marijuana, selling flowers to couples getting gay married ... or daylight saving time.