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Open letter to Roxanne

Sting's lyrics in the song "Roxanne" inspired Andrew's girlfriend to write a letter to her. (AP Photo/file)

Inspired listening to 1978 hit song “Roxanne” by Sting, Andrew’s girlfriend Genevieve was inspired to write a letter to Roxanne.

Dear Roxanne,

He’s right, you know; you DON’T have to put on the red light. But not because some former John gave you permission. How well do you even know this guy? He’s loved you since he knew you? Is this a mutual thing, or is he just one of those guys with a hero complex who thinks that if a sex worker kisses on the mouth, she’s legitimately into him? I’m not saying it’s not love, mind you. I hardly know you! I’m just encouraging you to consider your options. There are some very reputable GED programs out there and some good support programs for victims of sex trafficking if you think you’re being exploited. I’ll get you some literature.

I think I’m just a little baffled by this whole discussion. If you really don’t care if it’s wrong or if it’s right, then why all the moralizing from a guy who’s supposedly in love with you? I’m sure his heart is in the right place, but I would caution you to be careful about getting involved with someone who wants to make you a “project.” Sure, he says he won’t talk down to you now, but isn’t his whole argument a form of condescension that effectively denies you personal agency? Who is this guy to tell you what dress to wear or to put away your make-up? What might look like rescue today could look a lot more like an abusive and controlling partner tomorrow. (I mean, he “won’t tell you again”? Already, he’s making ultimatums.)

So, please, just consider your next move carefully. I realize this guy is making a lot of promises, and it’s true, I don’t know what you’ve been through, but beware of trading one kind of sexual servility for another. Let me know if you need the name of a good therapist; I’m happy to refer you.

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