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Phoenix Jones
Qualifications for the super hero gig include military or martial arts training, a valid driver's license, and a clean criminal record. Oh, yeah, and you can't be crazy or a journalist. (AP Photo/Joshua Trujillo/File)

Wanted: Phoenix Jones is taking applicatons for real-life superheroes

BY Kim Shepard  on January 9, 2013 @ 6:20 am (Updated: 9:04 am - 1/10/13 )

No matter how old you are, you may finally be able to realize your childhood dreams with the latest offer from Seattle's own Phoenix Jones.

On KIRO Radio's Andrew Walsh Show, the self-proclaimed superhero announced he is looking for a few good men and women to add to his team.

During his three years patrolling Seattle streets he's seen too many imitators doing things all wrong, like the guy who went around beating up drug dealers.

"Amusing, but you don't get anything done," says Jones. "No one gets arrested. The guy just gets mad and goes back to doing the same thing."

His work with the 'Rain City Superhero Movement' has given him the experience to do things right.

He admits that the real cops might say he's not an official crime fighter. But he claims he has hard evidence he is doing good out there.

"Seventy percent of their crimes don't get solved because they don't have a witness. My team, not only will we witness, we have a team of lawyers we will bring for ourselves," Jones explains. "I've been involved in over 100 cases where people have been prosecuted because of my testimony."

So, what is he looking for? Some kind of police, military or martial arts training is a must. You have to allow them to do a criminal background check - and you can't be crazy.

"A year ago we interviewed a guy who was absolutely crazy. His name was The Platypus," recalls Jones.

The Platypus wanted to use 'toxic balloons' filled with his own urine in his crime fighting, but Jones turned him away.

Also, journalists need not apply.

"The last thing I need is, like ten years from now, a book coming out 'Things I Learned with Phoenix Jones' that just has all this crazy stuff in it."

Oh, and the job doesn't pay. In fact you may have to write a check if you want to be involved. The team splits the cost for their liability insurance.

You can find out more about the job at Phoenix Jones' website.

Kim Shepard, KIRO Radio Reporter
Kim Shepard is a news anchor and reporter for KIRO Radio and the office optimist. She's energetic, quick to laugh and has a positive outlook on life.
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Comments (9)


  • Add A Comment

  • It's me! Ha ha! wrote...
    This fool
    January 9, 2013 6:38 am
    should be buying body armor a burial plot and a will!
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • TwoTrees wrote...
    This reminds me...
    January 9, 2013 7:13 am
    I've gotta rent 'Mystery Men' on Netflix.
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • Oly80 wrote...
    well, good news...
    January 9, 2013 7:15 am
    he already has the body armor!

    your post almost seems like a threat. are you the arch-nemesis he's been waiting for?

    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • Mavila wrote...
    Here's an Idea
    January 9, 2013 9:41 am
    We need to introduce The Platypus to Beautiful Existence.
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • CH wrote...
    as long as we can use tax money lots of tax money . . . .
    January 9, 2013 12:14 pm
    flounder is all in!
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • R L M 456 wrote...
    This will put the Seattle PD out of Business
    January 9, 2013 12:27 pm
    in 6 weeks
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • CH wrote...
    R L M 456 i hate to break the news to you . . . .
    January 9, 2013 1:16 pm
    the Seattle PD has been out of Business for years. not to be out done the BPD is banging each other. donuts or sex which would take?
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • R L M 456 wrote...
    CH-- I bow low
    January 9, 2013 9:32 pm
    you are correct

    I was wrong in my comment

    SPD has been down for YEARS

    thank you, for catching my error.

    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • anotherfencewalker wrote...
    But wait...their's more..
    January 9, 2013 6:44 pm
    He's not a true "Super Hero" until he gets shot at. Until then, he's a comic book strip.
    { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }
  • { "Thumbs Up":"1","Thumbs Down":"-1" }