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Carey was on the show! For no good reason that made me really happy. She is positively charming. More Carey! Heck, if Carey wants to write the blog I'll happily step aside.

So Luke restrained the Big Dog while talking to his sadly damaged neighbor. That dude has some issues. He needs a hug. In a couple months, I foresee Luke sharing a Good Will Hunting-esque tale where they hugged it out while Luke softly chants in Keith's ear "It's not your fault. It's not your fault. It's not your fault." As the hug breaks, Luke looks kindly into ole Keith's eyes and they both take a deep, calming breath. "Can we use your stairs now?"

hand in a box

I'm a little nervous to write this next part, but what are they going to do? Fire me? I am so stoked at Luke's changing attitude towards alcohol. I've been listening for something like four years now—although as Luke pointed out when we talked last week it feels a whole lot longer—and I've heard story after story of his wild vodka soda and gambling fueled nights. Not gonna lie, there were times where I felt sorry for the guy because it seemed like he was going hard every weekend. Anyone remember when he woke up in parts unknown and had to beg for a bus pass to get home? Though the story was funny, those were sad times. The fact that he's calmed down so much in so many areas of his life makes me really, really happy of him.

I'm guessing he's going to kick me to the curb for this post, so if this is my last, let me leave you with this.

Some mountains ARE too tall.

-toni hammer // whitestten@gmail.com // @realtonihammer

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As much as Burbank talks about PT and how great it is, there seems to be quite a cast of mean-spirited people. The lady in the building he works in, and now his neighbor, and I know there's been some other characters because I've been meaning to make this point for a while now. Maybe it's Luke. Maybe he's the Murder, She Wrote protagonist Jessica Fletcher of mean people. Isn't it weird that wherever Jessica Fletcher went someone died? Why would you have her visit your town if that was her m.o.?

Speaking of TV, this is kinda sorta not related to what the guys were talking about during their TV talk. I have two small children and we watch a ridiculous amount of TV. Sesame Street and Curious George are always on thanks to Netflix. I'm pretty sure my daughter's first full sentence was "Mom, remote, George, please" which translates to "Mom, here's the remote. Can we watch Curious George please?" (Thank you in advance for the kudos that my not even two year old says please.)

hand in a box

I've been thinking a lot about our TV consumption and how it was when I was a kid. My twin sister and I would watch the shows when they were on, but when they were off we were done and it was time to go play. My kids have the option to watch TV all day if they want and, I'll be honest, there have been days where that's happened. But if we didn't have Netflix that wouldn't be an option.

I guess what I'm saying is I want my kids to have a similar relationship with the TV that I did. I've been inspired. Starting tomorrow they can watch Sesame Street at 9 and Daniel Tiger at 10 and then the TV goes off for awhile. Time to break out the crayons and the play-doh.

So thanks Luke and Andrew! You can expect some angry emails from me this week around 10:45 when my kids are boring me to tears.

-toni hammer // whitestten@gmail.com // @realtonihammer

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I'm still not talking about poop. I don't care how many bags of feces Luke puts somewhere in the name of justice, I just can't talk about it.

What I can talk about, though, is being happy of Andrew for not putting up with that "the doctor is running behind" stuff.

hand in a box

I had a dentist appointment like that when I was seven months pregnant with my daughter. My appointment was at 4:30 on a Friday. I was there at 4:15. I was still there at 4:50. Since the front desk lady didn't deem it necessary to tell me anything, I waddled up to her and asked what was going on. I was greeted with a similar response as Andrew that they were running behind and it'll only be another 10 minutes. Okay. 15 more minutes go by. It is now after 5 o'clock. Once again I waddle and… you get the idea.

Here was my take away from it. I was going to be a mother soon. I needed to learn to stand up for myself and my daughter until she could do it her own self. Putting up with dentists and office staff who didn't have time for me or the courtesy to tell me what was going on? Those people weren't taking my time seriously and were being disrespectful. With the weight of all punctual people on my shoulders, I waddled out, feeling pride that I didn't let them take me for granted.

Every time a doctor's appointment begins on time, a receptionist gets her wings.

-toni hammer // whitestten@gmail.com // @realtonihammer

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Today on TBTL: Anger Edition, the dudes share their off the charts frustrations with below the charts experiences. Going to the dump? Brunch? Goodness, guys, I'm glad I'm not the only one who flies off the handle over insignificant events like removing garbage and consuming food. I've been known to have awful road rage and I don't even drive. Figure that one out.

hand in a box

Luke may finally, FINALLY, be accepting the fact that he's the type of guy who's got to go above and beyond to do certain things like be healthy. I think he needs the experience. He needs the bike ride to the dank garage where I assume all CrossFIt classes are held, the rubbing of elbows with senior citizens kettle belling way more than him, and the euphoric bike ride home during which he sings a Crows song with gusto because he made it through one more class without pulling his groin muscle. It's the little things that need celebrating.

I can't talk about the poop situation the guys' discussed. I deal with enough crap from my two children under two — I'm not going to do it for this unpaid gig. You can't make me.

I've fallen off of my self-built bandwagon of getting all of you involved on the old bloggity blog, so here's my question: What trivial event or experience have you seen red over? Leave a comment, shoot me an email, or tweet the story to me and I'll see if maybe Burbank will read some good ones on the show in the next couple years.

-toni hammer // whitestten@gmail.com // @realtonihammer

TBTL Song of the Day: Oy Vey by Mac Miller
My Song of the Day: Moonlight Kiss by Bap Kennedy

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Is anyone else surprised that Walsh has never been to Vegas? I have zero desire to go. If I want cheap entertainment and large crowds I'll go to a family function at my in-laws.

hand in a box

I thought Luke said something pretty insightful during Andrew's tax-related meltdown. He said that the stress comes from the not doing. Dude. Welcome to every thought I've ever had ever. Ever. I stress out about paying bills I know we have the money for. I stress out about what to eat when I know we have food. I stress out over if the sun will come out when... oh wait... I live in the Pacific Northwest. Yeah, that's worth the stress.

Ordinarily I'd dive into an inspirational "don't worry, be happy" monologue, but I'm too stressed it wouldn't live up to my unreachable standards. I should do something about that.

I'll only say this because I know he doesn't read these, but I met Luke at LiveWire this past weekend. I have to say that he is one of the most genuinely kind, selfless, warm-hearted souls I've met.

And, for my money, Former President George W. Bush listens to Ke$ha.

-toni hammer // whitestten@gmail.com // @realtonihammer

Song of the Day: Party Pit by The Hold Steady
My Song of the Day: My Love Remains by Ayron Jones & the Way

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