By JAMIE GRISWOLD
MyNorthwest.com

Results of a new study show that engaging in activities that you and your spouse view as exciting can help you feel more satisfied in your marriage.

"We did one experiment where we had people for two hours a week do something new and exciting and it dramatically increased the quality of their marriage," says Dr. Arthur Aron, from the Interpersonal Relationships Laboratory at the State University of New York.

Aron told KIRO Radio's Ross and Burbank that they had couples separately rate how they viewed a list of several activities.

"One set of couples were given activities that both had independently rated as highly exciting, but only moderately pleasant, and the other group were given activities both had rated as highly pleasant but only moderately exciting," says Aron.

The experiment results made a case for including activities that you and your spouse think of as exciting. "What we found is that over ten weeks those that were doing things that were highly exciting, but only moderately pleasant, showed a substantial increase in their rated marital satisfaction from before to after, where as those who had been doing the highly pleasant but only moderately exciting showed essentially no change."

Aron says couples should try activities that are new and challenging for both parties. "What maintains the sense of love and passion and excitement and connection, is that each of you is feeling that the relationship and the partner is making you grow, and giving excitement to your life, and you associate that with the relationship."

"If you go canoeing all the time, going canoeing again isn't that great a thing," says Aron. "If you go to the opera all the time, fine enjoy it, but if you've never gone to the opera and as long as neither of you hate the opera, give it a try."

Aron says beyond adding exciting activities day-to-day, you should also consider how you can help your partner grow in their long term goals.

"The things that affect you most are things that are new and challenging and exciting. In the long term though it's things that you feel you're growing from, that you have more in your life because of your partner."