RON AND DON

Seattle’s ‘porch pirates’ more brazen than ever

Oct 8, 2018, 4:46 PM
package thieves...
(Flickr Commons)
(Flickr Commons)

Porch pirates aren’t nearly as threatening as actual pirates, and they certainty don’t go on swashbuckling adventures, unless you count stealing packages an adventure. But numerous Seattleites have seen their packages go missing of late, and one Green Lake woman is doing plenty more than filing a complaint.

Mary Roy Green captured surveillance video of the daring theft, posted it on Reddit, and then plastered her neighborhood with posters of the perp with the phrase “I Steal Packages,” which is probably not a direct quote.

What exactly did the thief steal to prompt such aggressive action? Leggings.

“She’s not waiting for police. She wants the leggings back and she wants the leggings back now,” joked KIRO Radio’s Don O’Neill. “No word on whether these had a reinforced toe or not.”

In the video, the man casually walks up to the porch and grabs the package without a care in the world. It’s a far cry from the heist scene in Heat. The post got plenty of attention on Reddit and Green has been approached by multiple neighbors interested in helping spread the word, reports KOMO.

Package thieves known to follow delivery trucks

“There is an epidemic right now in our town of petty thievery, where people are emboldened,” said co-host Ron Upshaw. “It’s a brazenness now that I have never seen.”

“It’s really consequence-free right now because Amazon is so good at customer service and worried about their reputation that if you’re a customer in good standing that doesn’t abuse the return policy, they’ll just send you a new thing and write it off.”

RELATED: Package thief in Bothell receives immediate karma

These so-called porch pirates have been known to follow delivery trucks and grab packages shortly after they’re delivered. But while Mary Roy Green is taking action to find the thief, she hasn’t gone nearly as far as others.

One man in Tacoma rigged a shotgun blank to scare off would-be thieves, and a nanny in Everett apprehended a suspect herself and held her until the police arrived. Having to deal with Amazon customer service will sometimes bring that out of you.

Package thief… does he look familiar to anyone.? Stole a package off my porch today. He didn’t seem to notice the video cameras. Great video. Also have still photos. Made a police report but I think I might have better luck here. Put it out there so his face is familiar. from r/Seattle

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Seattle’s ‘porch pirates’ more brazen than ever