Ross: Following doctor’s orders after 54 weeks at the home office
It was time for my annual physical yesterday and the details are none of your business. But for my own good and to help my resolve, I am going to share one detail: It turns out that because I have been sitting in this chair Monday through Friday for 54 weeks, I am up six pounds.
You don’t need to know where they’re located, but according to my personal physician, they need to go.
None of this is my fault. There was one good thing about my daily commute, which was that every day I would have to climb down and then climb up 116 stairs to get to and from work.
Over the course of a work year that would be 28,420 stairs up, and 28,420 stairs down.
Well, unfortunately, my commute to the home office has only 14 steps.
So I am going to have to walk the stairs in this house an additional eight times up and down every day of the year.
But that’s not all. Because, you see, one of the perks at the home office is the unlimited supply of free snacks. All very healthy – various forms of chocolate-enhanced trail mix.
However, the medical evidence on display in the exam room yesterday indicates that even trail mix will go straight into your personal doggy bags and just stay there. So that will have to stop.
Which brings me to the final challenge: motivation. I was motivated to walk up those 116 steps because they’re the only way to get to one of the few unpatrolled parking spaces north of San Francisco.
There is no similar motivation here at home. What I’ll have to do is accidentally misplace things, like reading glasses, upstairs – so I have no choice but to climb the 14 steps to get them.
So if you notice that I’m slightly out of breath and unable to read the weather forecast – don’t worry, it’s just doctor’s orders.
And now I’m going go look for my portable radio so I can hear Colleen’s Daily Dose of Kindness. … Wait! I think I left it upstairs! I’ll be right back …
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