Maybe Hosni Mubarak just needs a hug

Feb 10, 2011, 8:33 AM | Updated: Mar 28, 2011, 3:48 pm


Dave Ross Commentary – Listen: Maybe Hosni Mubarak just needs a hug

Poor Hosni Mubarak. How could the President of Egypt could be so obtuse?

He says he is afraid of rushing too quickly into Democracy. What he really means is that he can’t bear the thought of powerlessness.

He likes the servants. The unlimited wealth. The deferential treatment.

But what he doesn’t get — what NONE of these middle eastern tyrants get — is that you can HAVE all that in a Democracy!

He’s convinced that only a police state can keep the have-nots at a safe distance; that he has to send out the goons to break up unions, and suppress dissent.

I wish I could just hug him and tell him — Hosni, just hold elections. Sure you’ll get kicked out of office… but you and your friends will be more powerful than ever!

What we have learned in America is that Democracy leaves MORE than enough room for control freaks like you.

Hosni — your mistake is that you think heading a government is what makes you powerful. No. The key to real power is not rising to the top of the government. The key to real power is rising to the top of a corporation, and MANIPULATING the government.

If you run a corporation — especially an investment bank, or an oil company — you can run not just Egypt, but MANY countries. And you can do it forever, because by law, you’re immortal.

And don’t forget Democracy’s latest innovation — UNLIMITED CORPORATE SPENDING ON CAMPAIGN ADS! Which means you can convince the voters of almost anything.

Seriously: why keep slumming as a mere tyrant, with ungrateful mobs shouting at you? Set up a corporate democracy and those same people will go to the polls, and cheerfully give you tax breaks.

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Maybe Hosni Mubarak just needs a hug