Dori: History goes missing with theft of Ballard Elks bell

My blood is boiling. A piece of history — a classic, 30-year-old, 800-pound brass bell — has been stolen from the Ballard Elks Lodge No. 827.

Ballard Elks trustee Joe Tiffany told me that after all the good the Elks have tried to do for the Ballard community, he is simply heartbroken.

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“It broke my heart,” he said. “We try to do so much for our community and our neighbors, and that’s all we do … reach out and change people’s lives in a good way. It was horrific.”

Tiffany said that the Ballard Elks bell was used to ring the “11th-hour toast” at 11 p.m. to honor absent Elks members.

“What could possibly be going through their minds when they’re doing this to this piece of history?” Tiffany said of the thieves. ” I just don’t know. I can’t fathom someone doing that. Crime is crime, and this one is not a victim-less crime.”

Pieces of the Ballard Elks bell have shown up in junkyards around the city. The Elks have recovered about one-fifth of it and hope to take the pieces they find, melt them down, and make a smaller bell to “at least retain some of that heritage and history.”

Ballard Elks bell: Latest victim of neighborhood crime

As is no surprise to any of us, Tiffany said that Ballard has gotten overrun with crime in recent years. The neighborhood is so dangerous that the Elks don’t let female bartenders leave alone at night. This is because, as we all know, Seattle has become a magnet for criminals and drug addicts from around the country thanks to the policies of our lawmakers.

You know why this happened. You know why this historic, 130-year-old bell was stolen and broken into pieces. Now it’s popping up in scrapyards as little chunks of brass that will have to be melted down. All so junkies can get their fix.

Even things that are bolted down are getting stolen all over the streets of our entire region throughout the Puget Sound area. But in Ballard it’s gotten particularly bad. And Ballard is represented by the great Councilmember Mike O’Brien, of course.

I came up with a brilliant idea yesterday, since Mike O’Brien has done as much as any other politician to turn the streets over to the vagrants and the criminals. He lets the addicts take over the streets. So, what I have proposed is that, to replace the Ballard Elks bell, we pool our money to cast a brand-new bell shell, but we make it even bigger, and we make Mike O’Brien the clapper in that bell.

Now, I’m not suggesting that any harm befalls Mike O’Brien. People would go by every once in a while, and grab one of his legs whenever they want to ring the bell. We’d assign people to feed him and we would put a sandbox under him.

This would achieve so many purposes. First and foremost, it would put the replacement of the bell squarely on the person who is most responsible for the stealing of the bell. With Mike O’Brien’s impeccable Lakeside and Duke credentials, I’m sure there would be no one better for this esteemed position. The pealing of the bell would be one of the most lovely sounds you and I have ever heard.

And just as a bone to throw in O’Brien’s tradition — we’ll change the word “o’clock” to “O’Brien” when we’re in Ballard. “Are we going to meet at the bar tonight?” “Yeah, I’ll see you at 7 O’Brien.” It will be a whole new way to pay homage to the guy who is responsible for all of this.

Since he’s the cause of this crime, Mike O’Brien needs to be part of the solution. That’s my idea, I hope you’re on board. Do you have any other ideas for the Mike O’Brien bell? Send us an email or comment below.

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