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Your laugh of the day — relive Jay Inslee MSNBC highlights with Dori

Gov. Inslee has long made climate change the banner issue of his presidential campaign. (Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

Jay Inslee was on three different MSNBC shows over the weekend. Don’t worry — I sat up until 3 a.m. watching every minute of his interviews so that you don’t have to. I picked out the best highlights that showcase what our governor really brings to this presidential race.

Without further ado, let’s look at the best of the best Inslee moments on MSNBC from this weekend.

The fastest-growing jobs in America are in the clean energy industry right now. Jobs in the clean energy industry are actually growing twice as fast as the rest of the United States economy.

I’ve exposed how bogus that stat is, because they’re starting with almost no jobs in that industry. They’re going from something like 6,000 jobs to 11,000, so of course any leap is going to be huge, on a percentage basis.

I’m all about jobs; we’re building the best economy in the United States in Washington. I want to do that for America.

So he’s going to do for America what he’s done for Washington. But he doesn’t mention the rampant crime in our area. We’ve got needles everywhere, we’ve got homelessness everywhere. We’ve got a gang war that’s only getting worse — the shooting in White Center on Sunday was more evidence of that.

Then he started talking about the Green New Deal, because he’s got to win over those cult members.

I love the fact that young people are driving this idea of a Green New Deal, and now we need policies to actually effectuate it. So I have a proposal and an experience that’s very unique in the field of candidates. One, it’s the only plan that will actually eliminate our use of coal-based electricity in 10 years. It is the only plan that will eliminate our use of fossil fuels in our grid in 15, and give us clean cars starting 10 years from now.

By the way, “effectuate” is an actual word, but it’s not a word anybody uses. That’s one of his problems — he doesn’t speak like the people to whom he is trying to appeal. Anyway, he says we’re not going to have any fossil fuels in 15 years. But he hasn’t been able to get any of this stuff passed here in Washington, even with our radical Democrat Legislature. So how does he plan to do this on a national level?

We have to defeat the climate crisis. This is our last chance. We cannot give power to Donald Trump, who says that wind turbines cause cancer — we know they cause jobs.

Remember that phrase. We’re going to come back to it.

That was Jay Inslee’s first MSNBC interview. Then he did a second interview on a different MSNBC show, where he started talking about Iran.

I don’t know what happened there — all I know is, it probably isn’t a very good bet to trust a man that has told us untruths about every two hours for the last two-and-a-half years.

Really? You’re going to talk about untruths, Mr. I-promise-I-won’t-raise-taxes-in-Washington-if-you-elect-me-as-governor? Alright. That’s a bold approach, given your background.

I think the more important question, though, is, why are we having this unnecessary tension with Iran? Why are we not observing the treaty, the agreement, which was on a path to keep them from becoming a nuclear power? Look, all of us are committed to Iran not becoming a nuclear power. We had an agreement; it was an enforceable agreement. They were complying with it. The international community was with us. There was no reason for this tension.

They shot down an unmanned drone over international waters, and you’re calling that “unnecessary tension?” That wasn’t provoked by us. They shot down our drone.

I’ve pledged to make defeating the climate crisis the number-one priority of the United States — that is a unique commitment. And my vision to do that has been called the ‘gold standard’ by Ocasio-Cortez, it’s been given an A by Greenpeace, I encourage people to take a look at it. You can go to Jay Inslee — my website — and take a look at it. I’ve also got a message of economic development by building a middle class instead of a trickle-down economy.

Did he forget his website? It sounds like he forgot the name of his website. It’s just jayinslee.com. How could he forget that? And the part about the middle class is interesting, because I’ve heard from Jenny Durkan and Dow Constantine and every Washington politician that we have no middle class in our state — that we’ve just got the haves and the have-nots, and that’s one of our biggest problems. But Inslee is expert enough in the middle class to build one for our nation? Oh, and of course citing the shout-out from AOC was very important.

The third interview brought even more Inslee gold on MSNBC. Once again, he used his favorite line.

Donald Trump can Tweet, he can say wind turbines cause cancer all he wants, but we know they cause jobs.

Then he did the latest rollout of his climate plan.

I’ve been rolling out the fourth part of my plan in Miami, a community that has been inundated by rising sea levels.

Have I missed that news? I have not seen any stories about Miami being underwater or the beaches disappearing. Huh. I must have completely missed that day of news.

Again, the problem with Jay Inslee is that the more people hear from him, the more bored they get by him.

In closing, HBO’s Bill Maher, who has had Inslee as a guest twice, said the following about our governor:

I would be even more nervous if [the nominee] was one of the dark horses in the race. Jay Inslee? I’ve never heard of him, and he’s been on this show twice.

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