Seahawks fan has guests sign contract to watch football at his home

For one Seahawks fan, watching a game is about more than gathering with friends and chatting. In fact, it has nothing to do with getting together with friends, and certainly nothing to do with talk. And he has the contract to prove it.

Seahawks fan Ken Graat posted on Twitter a contract he drew up for any friends who wish to watch football games at his house. It is the result of repeated experiences at football parties where people weren’t watching or commenting on the game, rather chatting about non-game related topics, KING5 reports.

To tackle the problem, the fan drew up a contract, something he does in relation to his job. Included in the contract: Cheering is only allowed when the Seahawks do something worthy of cheers, or when the opposing team experiences something bad; Talking is limited to the game, except for commercial breaks; Pre-game discussion is also limited to football; No one is allowed to jinx the game by saying they think the Seahawks will win or lose; Participants must arrive 30 minutes before kickoff; And parents are discouraged from bringing their kids to his house to watch the games.

The contract also states that victory cigars are to be had outside after a Seahawks win. If the Seahawks lose, however, it states in bold that “YOU SHOULD LEAVE.”

The first offense in breaking the contract results in a warning, the second is being kicked out of his house. The third offense results in banishment from watching Seahawks games at Graat’s home.

It may seem extreme, or comical, but it’s something that KIRO Radio’s John Curley knows something about. Curley’s 13-year-old son, Ry, also has no patience for chatty-Cathys at football gatherings. The solution to the offense?

“A box,” Ry told Curley and co-host Feliks Banel on KIRO Radio.

The box in particular was for the Seahawks’ 2014 Super Bowl game against the Broncos. There was too much chatter going on in the room, so Ry mentioned he needed a box to watch the game.

“But I was speaking metaphorically when I asked you to do that,” Ry said to his father. “I said I want to watch the Super Bowl in a box because I hate when I’m distracted by other things. I didn’t actually mean that. But you come home with a box from a $1,000 toilet that could fit like three people in it.”

“I didn’t realize you were speaking metaphorically,” Curley responded. “I didn’t know when you were 11 years old that you knew what ‘metaphorically’ meant.”

“I cut a hole in the box so you could sit in there, you had a pillow,” he said. “You watched the Super Bowl from the box.”

Ry had to admit, it wasn’t too bad of an idea.

“You cut eye-holes in the box … It worked,” Ry said.

But the box wasn’t around for the 2015 Super Bowl when Ry needed it. Again, ill-informed guests were chatting away during the important game. And when the final play lost the Seattle team the game, Ry couldn’t be around them any longer.

“Then when we lost, tragically, they say, ‘there’s always next year.’ That’s like the worst thing you can say at that time,” Ry said. “Of course there’s always next year, but that’s not this year. I held back my anger, but I went upstairs and I broke a bunch of things.”

Ry said that for the next Super Bowl, a box may be needed. But he did note that he may not need the remedy. Curley asked his son who would win the next Super Bowl.

“Not the Seahawks. They’ll definitely be in the championship round,” he said. “I’d say probably either Denver or New England.”