You might be why Seattle women are big drinkers

A recent study found that King County’s women are among the heaviest drinkers in the nation, and while there are many assumed reasons for this phenomenon, one local writer blames Seattle’s men.

Local woman rank among the top 10 percent of drinkers in the nation, and the top 25 percent for female binge drinking, according to a study by the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation, headed by researcher Ali Mokdad, a professor at the University of Washington.

The study points to a few possible reasons for the high rate of female imbibers, such as the bevy of local brews and wine, and the fact that when the economy goes down, drinking increases. But Drew Atkins with Crosscut gathered informal, unscientific examples to form another theory. His assertion: women are bored with Seattle’s men.

That’s right. Women need some liquid assistance to find local men remotely interesting.

Atkins points to the many tech imports and how women don’t find it interesting to hear about their philosophies on team leadership.

“Why do his women friends say they drink so much? Because men are boring,” Tom Tangney said on KIRO Radio’s Tom and Curley Show.

“And by far, the biggest boozers in the state are in San Juan County,” Tom said. “You know why? Because when summer ends, there’s nothing to do, supposedly. So they drink. And in rural Garfield County, there’s not much to do. So they drink.”

Add dating into the mix and it’s a whole other mess.

“They say that the men around here are pretty boring because they keep their guard up and say the least interesting things possible,” Tom said. “And the women then drink to make a boring date better. If you start drinking, it goes down more easily … that’s a knock against people like me, who are longtime Puget Sound residents.”

“Then you got this influx of young, rich, smart techies, and they are the worst. They also drive women to drink because they all talk about things with jargon and about team leadership and are the worst conversationalists ever,” he said. “Because of that, women have no idea how to cope with the duds they are dating, so they just drink to pass the time.”

Tech men also have other factors working against them, such as the fact that there are too many of them in Seattle.

How many tech-imports coming to the Seattle area is unknown. What is known is that more than 15,000 people are moving into the King County area each year from California alone and companies like Amazon have so many men flooding into its buildings, there’s not even enough bathroom space for them.

Co-host John Curley looked into the data to compare Seattle with its East Coast counterparts. He found that women on the East Coast tend to drink a little less. The reason: men again.

“Women on the East Coast, socializing in bars are more careful because the guys are so good at picking up women … so they are more defensive,” Curley said. “Their friends are more likely to stay with them and guard them because the guys are such movers and shakers. Here, I guess, the women just realize it doesn’t matter; it’s never going to happen.”

Curley also notes that West Coast men fail at picking up dating signals.

So not only are Seattle women drinking more to cope with boring men, the men aren’t good at dating to begin with.

On the other hand, don’t be too discouraged, men of Seattle. All it takes is just a little interesting conversation, Tom notes. And after all, maybe you’re bland, but at least you’re not bland looking.