An interview with Sasquatch

Sasquatch is real. Most people just don’t believe in him, according to a Pemco Insurance poll, but Pat Cashman, filling in for Dori spoke with the legend himself to find out what life is like for the giant hairy monster.

“My name is Carol,” said the legendary beast in a live phone interview.

He wasn’t what Pat or co-host Lisa Foster expected; a sensitive, intelligent creature, he said that he and his fellow Bigfoot brethren were trying to debunk the myth of their nonexistence.

“That’s all I’m asking, is for people to believe in me! You don’t know what it’s like to go through life when nobody believes in you,” said Carol, “Or maybe only a third of the people?”

But according to the hard data produced by the poll, fourteen percent of people in the Pacific Northwest say they or a friend have sighted one of Carol’s Bigfoot cousins. And over a third of people living in the Pacific Northwest believe Bigfoot is – or could be – real.

“I have no reason to doubt him,” said Pat. “In fact, a third of the people around here believe in him. It.”

But Pat and Lisa started to doubt Carol when he said he couldn’t describe himself because he’d never seen a mirror. He could only say that he’s very hairy.

Though Pat is a believer, Lisa said she’s not buying it until Carol sends some family photos. For now they want you to decide: could Bigfoot be real?