Dori’s brilliant idea: Grounded 737 MAX jets as homeless shelters

In January, Boeing is going to suspend production of the 737 MAX planes that were grounded in March after two crashes.

Thankfully, it looks like no employee layoffs are expected. But what do you do with the 400 airplanes in storage that have already been built, but now can’t be delivered because no airline wants them?

I am an idea man, and I have a brilliant idea. We could scatter the planes around the city and have them operate as homeless shelters. We would have the coolest shelters in the country.

Each one of them already comes with a few bathrooms. There are windows for the people to look out of. If it’s a rainy day out, you can pull down the shade. And hey, there are already barf bags onboard.

Lawyer suing Boeing over Lion Air crash was scheduled to board 737 MAX 8

We will make it law that if you need anything, you can just push the little call button for the flight attendant, and Jenny Durkan has to come to your aid. I’m sure those shelters will be filled to the, uh, max.

And here’s where it gets interesting. Who gets to decide who gets first class?

If you don’t like the planes-as-homeless-shelters idea, then I have another idea for what to do with the 737 MAX jets. Instead of the wide wheel base that we use to land the planes, couldn’t we retrofit them and put them on the Seattle streetcar tracks, the ones that the streetcars didn’t fit? You see, back in the 1960s, we were known as “Jet City.” The 1962 World’s Fair was the “World of Tomorrow.” Now, finally, we could accomplish that vision by having airplane streetcars running up and down First Avenue. It would be like Tomorrowland at Disneyland.

Listeners sent in some great ideas for the 737 MAX homeless shelters. Check them out:

“They can stay at the ‘Fuse-Lodge.'”

– The 253

“Instead of light rail, can we call it flight rail?”

– The 206

“Make the cockpit of the 737 MAX a safe injection site.”

– The 253

“Just turn the ‘destructive war machine‘ planes into buses for mass transit.”

– The 425

“The wings can act as a temporary stage for the drag queen strippers.”

– The 253

Do you have more ideas for our 737 MAX homeless shelters? Send them to us via our show email address, or leave them in the comments below.

Listen to the Dori Monson Show weekday afternoons from 12-3 p.m. on KIRO Radio, 97.3 FM. Subscribe to the podcast here.

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