Running through life: A letter to my 8-year-old son

I ran my first marathon on Saturday. As a follow up, here’s a letter I wrote to my 8-year-old son:

Dear Gunner,

Your dad ran his first marathon in the woods this past weekend at the Redmond Watershed. Here’s a couple things I wanted to share with you about what I learned.

#1. Running a marathon is like … running a marathon.

#2. If you embrace a plant based diet like your father, all that fiber comes to visit about mile 9. Don’t panic. Have a plan. There is no toilet paper on the trails Gunner.

#3. When you hear “be careful today, we just spotted a mama bear and her cub on one of the trails,” be sure to clear your pockets of all honey flavored GU. And bare with the bears. It’s all part of the experience.

#4. If you ever find yourself running off course like your father did at mile 10, don’t quit, laugh at yourself, ask for help (which is very hard for me). Get back on the trail and do your best. That might be a good metaphor for life.

#5. The trail-runner’s that I saw hurting and struggling the most, were the most encouraging to other runner’s on the trail. I’ve seen you do that too Gunner. It’s one of my favorite qualities about you. I want to be more like them, and you.

#6. Everybody on that trail is carrying something. It’s OK to release things you have been carrying. Sometimes as humans we get stuck. Sometimes as adults we don’t deal with those things and we numb. Letting go is tough. It takes courage. Let it go into the universe. It’s how we get unstuck and headed back down the trail. It’s how we become back in charge of our own lives. On the trails that call it being a “Trail -Boss. “

#7. When I was a child, I ran like you do now. I ran fast, free, and uninhibited. And then adults told me to “SLOW DOWN.” Don’t slow down Gunner. Keep running fast and free with the innocence, the presence, and the joy of a child. Don’t ever forget, from the time we left our mother’s womb, we were all born to run.

#8. Run with the changing of the seasons. Run in the leaves, the snow, the mud, and the sunshine. Every season will teach you something about yourself. Stay curious about who you are Gunner, and who you are becoming. It’s how we as humans evolve, change, become enlightened, and help one another.

#9. Be a good human, friend, and world-citizen Gunner. And be the trail-boss of your own life. As a result, you will be surrounded by other trail-bosses who will come run with you. It is known as having a tribe. Run with your tribe Gunner. They will be with you through all seasons of life, on and off the trail.

#10. Running and training for a marathon over the past seven months has been painful Gunner. It hurts. Hurt, pain, and struggle in life is a great teacher. By facing our most painful moments, we have the ability to change the trajectory of our lives. It gives us the ability to be a better friend, neighbor, and human. In my case I think it has given me a better opportunity to be your father. It has also given me the courage and direction to be the trail-boss for the rest of my life’s journey.

Just one final thought for you my son. If you need to wear headphones, dial up Hansen’s one hit wonder from 1997 called “MMMBop.” It’s hard to believe after 21 years, it still holds up. Turn it up, lift your head toward the forest canopy, and don’t run staring at your feet. There are too many good things that are coming down the trail for you, and I don’t want you to miss them. If it is a bear, you now know what to do. Now you go be a boss!

I love you, Gunner.

Your daddy and fellow “Trail -Boss,”

~ don

*If you want to come run in the woods and learn to be a “Trail-Boss”, check out all the great trail runs at Northwest Trail Runs.