Pink Slime Update: QFC and Fred Meyer latest to go filler free

Another major grocery chain will no longer carry beef containing the controversial “pink slime” as the parent of QFC and Fred Meyer joins the growing list.

Add QFC and Fred Meyer to the list of grocery stores
pulling their “pink slime” after parent company Kroger
announced it will no longer carry ground beef with the
controversial by-product filler.

Listen to
Dori’s pink slime update

It’s been top of mind (and stomach) for Dori since the
story started sizzling over the last couple of weeks. The
self-avowed meat lover has been on a crusade to uncover
who’s selling the stuff after learning nearly 70 percent
of
ground beef sold contains the concoction of ammonia-
treated cow products.

One bright spot of the controversy is the emergence of our
favorite corporate spokesperson, Janet Reilly of the
American Beef Institute. She’s been outright angry at
questions about calling the stuff “finely textured lean
beef product.”

“What are you asking me to put on the label? It’s beef,
it’s on the label. It’s a beef product. It says beef, this
is beef. So we are declaring it is beef,” she replied
testily in a recent interview with ABC News.

“That’s one beef every 1.8 seconds by my calculations,”
laughed Dori.

While he’s relieved Albertson’s, Safeway, Costco and many
others have now declared they will no longer carry
products containing pink slime, he’s worried about the
unintended consequences of removing it from one of his
favorite foods.

“I’m afraid that my body somehow through some evolutionary
process has found a way to compensate for my ammonia
intake via the pink slime…it is now going to be
compensating for something that is no longer present in my
system and I’m afraid it’s going to negatively affect me.”

But Dori is giddy his already stellar burger cooking
skills are about to reach a new level of culinary
excellence.

“They are going to be orgasmic now that they are pink
slime free, if you don’t mind my saying,” Dori whispered
suggestively.

“So now we can get back to just good, healthy red meat
clogging our arteries the way the good lord intended it to
be.”