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Dori: You can snort coke openly, but not through a plastic straw

(AP Photo/Wilfredo Lee, File)

Seattle has announced that a ban on plastic straws and utensils in restaurants takes effect July 1.

If a Seattle police officer sees someone snorting cocaine with a plastic straw, they will take the straw but will leave the cocaine, right?

RELATED: Seattle’s plastic straw and utensil ban takes effect July 1 for all food providers

They’re not busting people for possessing small amounts of drugs. The straw has got to go, but the cocaine — you can keep that. Snohomish County has said that it won’t charge you for possessing less than 2 grams of drugs, and Seattle has a de facto legalization of possession.

Bob Donegan, president of Ivar’s, said that the new regulations will cause meal prices to go up, since the cost of the straws has now gone from three cents to 18 cents.

I don’t know what huge difference to the environment it’s going to make.

We are truly the bizarro city. We’re going to have the heroin death site ice cream trucks going up and down the street, and now you can snort cocaine, but not with a plastic straw. It’s really, really an interesting place these days.

Seattle — you can shoot up heroin, you can snort cocaine, but if you use a non-compostable fork — you’re off to the jailhouse.

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