Spike: My daughter is struggling to start a family, and I know how hard that journey can be

Easily one of the greatest experiences of my life has been being a father. I was launched into fatherhood when I married my wife, who came into my life as a single mother of the incredible woman who has been my daughter for nearly 40 years.

So great was the life we’d established that we tried to add to our family for the longest time. But in time we discovered that the medical challenges we faced proved to be too much to overcome, so we accepted the reality of our situation and settled comfortably and gratefully into the fact that we would be a one-child family. Eventually, becoming empty-nesters at a rather early age.

But fate has a way of undermining even the best-laid plans, and not too long after, my wife and I were blessed with our second child, who arrived after my 40th birthday. Looking back, it’s safe to say the effort to expand our family was not an easy one, but my personal experience came nowhere close to the stress, anxiety, and even heartbreak my wife lived through during this period of medically assisted attempts to conceive a child.

Now our oldest and her husband find themselves at the same place in life. Marrying a little later in life than we did, well into their 30s, their efforts to start a family may face any number of increased challenges, from societal to financial to biological hurdles placed simply by the passage of time.

In all honesty, I never really thought about being a grandfather, a “Papa”! But the excitement and dedication and passion our kids are showing in this pursuit have me pining for the opportunities and joys I’ve always associated with being a grandparent. And if you think I’m excited, you should see my wife!

The kids are pursuing these arduous and sometimes incredibly stressful efforts towards medically assisted conception. Changing their lifestyles, their diets, even changing jobs in their effort to give nature every advantage in its part in their journey to start a family. I know first-hand how sometimes difficult it can be, particularly when all you can do is watch, knowing all too well that there’s only so much our family can do to support them in their efforts towards this journey.

I need to take a moment to acknowledge our new in-laws and the incredible family that my daughter was blessed to become a member of. Their unwavering support of the kids and their endeavor to undertake this journey is nothing short of incredible.

All of our hopes rise and fall with the kids every month, and I have to say their dedication to this most time-honored of all human experiences brings both incredible joy and a reminder that not every moment of parenthood is easy. I feel that it really isn’t meant to be. Nothing truly worthwhile is. They, like us, while inspirationally dedicated, are also realistic, and they know that fate, and even a higher power, will decide what their future will bring.

I know there are probably many families going through these same trying and often exasperating situations our family finds themselves in, and often financial realities are the difference between success and failure in these efforts. There’s some comfort in that, and it’s important to keep in mind that whatever the outcome of this experience, there’s beauty and fulfillment in making the journey together as a family, and whatever the outcome, our family is going to be stronger because we went on it together. So keep our kids and our joined families in your thoughts, and if it applies, in your prayers. You gotta admit, I’d make one heck of a grandpa!

Listen to “The Jake and Spike Show” weekdays from noon to 3 p.m. on KIRO Newsradio 97.3