Ross: 60 second solutions to our most pressing problems
May 3, 2019, 6:49 AM
(Quinn Rooney/Getty Images)
Here are some random ideas that occurred to me during the week that would solve various problems that keep coming up.
Today’s subjects include the Mueller investigation (of course), social media, the manufacturing economy, and the environment. And I have 60 seconds.
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Investigations: Since perpetual investigations are now the norm, all candidates for public office, the moment they officially announce, will each be assigned their own special counsel who will pre-emptively investigate them to save time.
Social media: It’s time that Facebook started a service where any American can pay to buy insulting Putin videos that popup all over Russia whether people have computers or not.
The economy: If you’re trying to bring back manufacturing jobs, give more money to people who need the stuff we manufacture! Give money to people who need refrigerators and washers and speed boats. Why are we giving it to rich people who have all that stuff already?
The environment: To reduce the amount of trash – package food inside of food! For example when you get a Chicken Caesar wrap – what is it? It’s a Chicken Caesar mixture wrapped in a flour tortilla. It’s already wrapped! That’s why it’s called a “wrap!” Why does it have to be wrapped again in paper? If you must wrap it a second time, just wrap it in another tortilla and slap the barcode on that. When you get home feed the extra tortilla to the pets.
Problem solved, Earth saved.