Scenarios: ‘I want my husband to get a matching tattoo with me’
On the Gee and Ursula Show, hosts Gee Scott and Ursula Reutin give advice to help other people in a segment called … Scenarios.
Guest host Mike Lewis joins the show while Ursula is on vacation.
Scenario: My husband asked me what I wanted for Christmas like he does every single year. Usually, I have a nice list of easy things for him to get, and he chooses something from the list and then gets creative with other gifts around that one thing. It’s awesome. He’s a good gift-giver when he is pointed in the right direction. Well, this year, I gave him one thing, I want matching tattoos, but each would have a different line from the same song that is about how much we love each other. The song is the first dance of our wedding. We both love the song. It’s our song, but he said he didn’t want a matching tattoo or any tattoos. He says he hates tattoos and overall thinks they’re trashy and matching tattoos are goofy. He said his buddies would make fun of him. I told him he could get his on his ankle or lower back where nobody would see it. He still said no. This is all I want for Christmas. Am I asking for too much?
Mike Lewis: Yes. You’re asking for too much. I mean, I don’t. Personally, I don’t mind. I don’t agree with his standards regarding tattoos. I think tattoos are fine. I only have one. And it’s older than some people here in the newsroom.
Gee Scott: Is it on the small of your back?
ML: It is not, it’s on my shoulder blade. It is, actually, a pretty nerdy one. I wanted a journalism-themed tattoo when I was in college because I was on my school paper. And so I got the little boxes in the corner of the New York Times that says ‘All the news that’s fit to print.’ That literally is on my shoulder blade. But my bigger point is no one should be forced to get a tattoo if they don’t want to get a tattoo. Some people take that super personally, find something else.
Andrew “Chef” Lanier: I’m just imagining your next tattoo Mike from The Washington Post ‘Democracy dies in darkness’ on the other shoulder, that’d be perfect for you, like a pair of like journalistic wings. I’m gonna say no with a caveat. Were your husband somewhat into tattoos I would say no. The caveat here is if your husband’s reasoning for not wanting to get this matching tattoo is because of what his buddies think about him, ‘they’re gonna think I’m an idiot and loser, and I’m, I’m whipped in my marriage.’ Here’s the deal, you should never care about what anyone else thinks about your relationship. And if you care about what they think, and they’re ragging you over it, you probably need to get rid of that friend. So that is the problem in your relationship.
GS: Hey, brothers, and sisters, of the Gee and Ursula Show, I know sometimes we agree on some things. I know sometimes we disagree on some things, but can we come to one resolution – one thing that we can all stand pat on? Let’s not do that. Let’s not do the matching tattoos. If someone wants to not get a matching tattoo, let’s, please allow them the space to say no to that. Now I have my opinion on it. But it’s not even about my opinion, or whether or not you should get it or not get it. By the way, you shouldn’t get it, most marriages end in divorce anyways. And there’s nothing like being divorced, and you still got that tattoo on you. And then you’re with your new boo, and while you’re with your new boo, your ex says, ‘haha ask him about that tattoo on his shoulder.’
ML: I’m against the idea but let me offer one compromise. If you’re going to get a tattoo or make him get a tattoo or you manage to browbeat him into getting a tattoo, at least get a tattoo design that is easily modifiable into something else. Remember the famous example of Johnny Depp, who had Winona Ryder ‘Winona forever’ tattooed on his body? And then what did he change it to when they broke up? Wino forever. He actually had a pathway to make this tattoo different upon parting in the relationship. I’m not suggesting that that is your future. But just give him an out.
GS: I’m super excited right now because Nick is not here. But Andrea is filling in for Nick and Andrea is going to weigh in on this topic. Good morning, Andrea.
Andrea (the board operator): Yeah, I have a lot of thoughts on this. Basically, I think if you’re gonna get matching tattoos, that’s the kiss of death. That relationship is probably doomed. I can’t think of a time when that’s worked out. So don’t do it. And especially if he doesn’t even like tattoos. It makes no sense. She’s asking for too much.
GS: She made too much sense. Have you ever heard of a relationship Chef where they were like, ‘Hey, we almost didn’t make it, but boy, we wouldn’t get those matching tattoos? It saved us.’
AL: Isn’t it kind of like the adult version of giving each other hickeys before you go to high school?
GS: This is an age thing, Mike, me and you have been vibing on our age. You remember that back in the day, bro. You remember hickeys man?
ML: I didn’t date much in high school and man, that wasn’t really my choice. It took a village to keep me from dating – it was other people’s choices. Let’s just be honest about this. So I was an aspirational hickey giver-and-getter rather than an actuality. But I do remember it quite well. It’s funny because I think that that whole idea has gone away, right?
GS: I’m talking to Gen X and baby boomers, talking to you. You guys remember, remember the hickeys? Now I know you’re not going to tell your kids anything about this. You got to pretend like it didn’t happen if your kids are in the car right now – you’re gonna deny it.
ML: The hickeys, of course. They frequently lasted longer than the relationships.
Listen to Gee Scott and Ursula Reutin weekday mornings from 9 a.m. – 12 p.m. on KIRO Newsradio, 97.3 FM. Subscribe to the podcast here.