Harger: Your 1980s Halloween costume would get you fired today

And if anyone from KIRO HR is reading this, now would be a great time to switch over to Seattle Sports. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.

When I was a kid in the ’70s and early ’80s, Halloween costumes were … simpler. By “simpler,” I mean problematic.

We didn’t buy them at Target or Spirit Halloween. We raided Dad’s closet, stole Mom’s eyeliner, and hoped for the best.

One year, I went as a “hobo.” Twice, actually. I didn’t even know what that word meant. I just knew it involved rumpled old dirty clothes, charcoal smudged on my cheeks, and a stick with a red handkerchief on the end.

That was just what kids did back then. You dressed as a train-hopping drifter and went door-to-door asking for candy.

Another year, I went as a ghost. White sheet. Two holes for eyes.

Today? Yeah, that’s a hard no.

More than a few kids had paper feather headbands and plastic tomahawks. Bows and arrows. Can you imagine that today?

And every year, someone’s dad showed up in a giant sombrero and a fake mustache with a plastic six-shooter on their hip. Back then, it got laughs. Today, it would get a meeting with HR.

It was a different time.

For us kids, we didn’t think in terms of “problematic.” We thought in terms of “cheap.”

What are the costumes today that, 40 years from now, will make people cringe?

Maybe the kid dressed as a “social media influencer” who carries a selfie ring light and a fake sponsorship deal.

Or the “AI robot” costume, which will seem really offensive once the machines are running the planet.

Or the “tech billionaire” outfit: hoodie, sneakers, emotional detachment. An easy costume now, a scandal later.

Still, I love Halloween. I love that for one night, everyone steps outside themselves. Just some more literally than others.

And I especially love seeing the kids who come to our door.

We didn’t have a lot of money growing up, but I made myself a promise back then: When it was my turn to hand out candy, I’d do it right. No fun-size nonsense. Full-size bars.

And tonight, I’m keeping that promise. We’ve got the big Snickers. The big M&M’s. The full-size 100 Grand bars.

So have fun tonight, get a designated driver, and may your costume, whatever it is, still be socially acceptable in 40 years.

That’s the commentary for Oct. 31. Text us at (888) 973-5476 or leave a comment at MyNorthwest.

Charlie Harger is the host of “Seattle’s Morning News” on KIRO Newsradio. You can read more of his stories and commentaries here. Follow Charlie on X and email him here. 

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