Ross: How you can be a patriotic Mega Millions winner

I never liked  lotteries. In America, you’re supposed to get wealthy by having a brilliant idea and then working hard to make it real, not by having a pile of money drop into your lap.

But I realized resistance is futile. It’s useless to argue how slim the odds are – because it turns out that the worse the odds are, the better people like it because the jackpot gets so mega.

And the current Mega Millions jackpot is not just round-the-world-cruise mega, or breast-implants-for-all-your-friends mega. This is fund-your-own-moon-launch mega.

However, if you do win it, please don’t fund your own moon launch. That’s already being done. You should do something no one else is doing.

After spending the weekend visiting with family — which involved riding in cabs, and buses, and back seats — what I would like the Mega Millions winner to do is just pick a stretch of highway and resurface it.

I have to say for a first world country, we have some really crummy roads. Especially around cities. Almost like someone was trying to stop us from driving so much.

So to the new billionaire, be a patriot. Do what apparently no one else can – build a model stretch of highway on time and under budget. Just to remind us all that it can be done. Name it after yourself, and if you do it right, there would probably be some left for the implants.

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