Ross: Fighting inflation with the power of coupons

What do we do when inflation is running at 7%? We try to get a good deal.

That’s your duty as an American – not to get lazy, but to shop harder, by using all the coupons you can.

This is a big concession for me, because in general, I hate using food coupons. Having to carry them around, and having to say “here’s my coupon” – I just feel that nobody wants to be in line behind the person with a fistful of coupons.

But if you want prices to go down, you have to send a message to the stores that the discounts make a difference. So when my wife said there’s a buy-one-get-one-free sale on the organic boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breasts, I said I’d do it. I did the calculations and “buy-one-get-one-free” is like half price if you can find two packages of equal value.

Take that, inflation.

So I went to the store, walked past the tempting tubs of cubed watermelon, past the exotic chopped salad kits, past the designer cheeses, and straight to the poultry section. After careful examination of the inventory, I chose a perfectly-matched pair of boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breasts, and brought them to the cashier, who scanned them, and then scanned the coupon, and the machine went “BAAAT.”

She tried it again, and again it went “BAAAT.”

“That’s puzzling,” I said.

The sale didn’t end until tomorrow; the coupon said “boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breasts,” and then she looked at the monitor and she said, “here’s the problem, sir: You have the boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breasts, but what you need are the ORGANIC boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breasts.”

By this time, there’s another person in line. The cashier says, “don’t worry – I’ll send someone to get the correct chicken breast.” But at this point, all I’m really thinking about is what this other person must be thinking about me trying to shoplift a half-price “boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breast.” Obviously everybody knows the coupon was for a completely different chicken product.

That was the longest three minutes of my life, as I waited for the runner to come back with the ORGANIC boneless skinless free-range air-chilled chicken breast.

The only thing that saved the situation is that we were all wearing masks, so I’m pretty sure if I don’t wear the red KIRO jacket next time, no one will recognize me.

Listen to Seattle’s Morning News with Dave Ross and Colleen O’Brien weekday mornings from 5 – 9 a.m. on KIRO Newsradio, 97.3 FM. Subscribe to the podcast here.

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