Why don’t we just buy the Mexican side of the border?

The immigration discussion is off the rails.

Congress is stuck, the president is completely unstuck, and as tone deaf as Melania’s jacket was, a lot of people are ready to get one like it.

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So I have a modest proposal. Let’s just buy the Mexican side of the border. The United States should buy the northern 15 miles of Mexico, clear out the gangs, and make it a safe zone so people fleeing Guatemala and El Salvador can settle there, make a life, live peacefully with their kids, and, after a few years when they’re ready and we’re ready, enter the United States legally.

But Dave, you say, we can’t just buy Mexico.

Of course we can. In fact we did with the Gadsden Purchase in 1854. It cost $10 million for 29,670 square miles of Mexico. That, coincidentally, is the exact same area as the 15-mile strip just below the current Mexican border. In today’s dollars we’re talking $289 million, which is what the US government spends in approximately four hours.

And the best part is, this would be a real estate deal, which the president is good at.

You wouldn’t have to change any laws, and if we do a good job, you wouldn’t need a new wall because no one would even want to cross the border.

But Dave, you say, that’s nation building. No it’s not. It’s like buying the house next door, fixing it up, and renting it out.

And if you believe that’s just too weird, just remember that nothing is weirder than what’s going on right now.

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