Today’s lesson: zombie survival

Dave Ross is always seeking ways to better himself. So he’s particularly interested in a new class that could help him survive a coming zombie apocolypse.

Michigan State University is offering the seven week course this summer, and the professor says he’s deathly serious.

The class is actually about how human behavior changes during catastrophes, both historical and hypothetical — including zombie epidemics.

“We are using the idea of a zombie apocalypse to attract attention to the important research and science on the topic of ‘Catastrophes and Human Behavior,’ Glenn Stutzky, social work instructor and creator of the course told WXYZ TV.“Students will learn about the nature, scope and impact of catastrophic events on individuals, families, societies, civilizations and the Earth itself.”

Listen to Surviving the zombie apocolypse

If zombies do attack our area, Ross is ready. “We actually have a whole tribe put together in our community,” he told guest co-host David Boze from AM 770 The Truth.

“We have one person who is an excellent carpenter and wood worker and can build things, we have another guy who is a commercial fisherman who also with our carpenter friend knows how to refine fish oil into biodiesel, also a clean water expert…we have a person who can build pottery…and of course I know how to build an AM radio from scratch.”

Ross also has a secret weapon. “That’s my one zombie defense because I can do the Michael Jackson Thriller dance.”

But Boze counters it’ll take a lot more than that. A lot more bullets. And the self-avowed gun “enthusiast” says Ross will need him in his tribe to survive a zombie invasion.

“You have to have a gun fanatic friend…I’m a big hunter, it would be like open season,” Boze says.

As for producer Andrew, the guys give him about a day of survival before he becomes food for the undead.

“We decided that we are going to be radio experts,” Andrew says about his ill-conceived stab at survival. “But this is a problem because we can’t fix them.”

Andrew says he and co-host Luke Burbank are hoping to have the highest rated show on zombie radio. “I’m going to be making rundowns of things to talk about such as ‘is this a good zombie apocolypse how does it rate?’ Then I’m going to hand the rundown to Luke and he’s going to talk about it for 3 hours.”

Boze suggests they’d be better off playing dead instead. Or at least going back to school and taking the crash course in zombie survival.

-Josh Kerns/My Northwest.com