Now we know why Superman worked alone

Listen to Dave Ross’ Commentary: Now we know why Superman worked alone

Yes, now we know why Superman worked alone. Because a Super Committee would’ve decided Lois Lane wasn’t worth saving.

So now what?

In this Nov. 15, 2011 file photo, Sen. Patty Murray, D-Wash., co-chair of the Joint Select Committee on Deficit Reduction, runs out of answers for reporters after a closed-door meeting with Democratic members of the Supercommittee, in Washington. (AP Photo/File/J. Scott Applewhite, File)

“By law, the failure of the Super Committee will trigger automatic across the board spending cuts to nearly every government program, but those cuts do not go into effect for 13 months and some law advisors hope that they can figure out some more intelligent way to cut the debt between now and then.”

Oh yeah — more committee meetings! We’re past meetings!

We’re stuck. Because no one’s really sure just how ruthless the other side is willing to be. And there’s only one way to find out: since politics no longer works, all that’s left is to see which interest group can block the most bridges during rush hour. Let the most annoying protest win!

Which leads me to this piece of investment advice, two words: pepper spray.

And as we sit in traffic waiting for the air to clear, the clock ticks toward the 2013 deadline, when by law, there must be automatic cuts of up to 10 percent in things like federal money for cops, possibly the Post Office, definitely the military.

But to look at the bright side, those cuts are bad news for lone-wolf terrorists like that guy arrested in New York…

“Who was plotting to bomb police patrol cars and also postal facilities, as well as targeted members of our armed forces returning from abroad.”

Too bad for you Mr. Anarchist. We’ll be cutting that stuff anyway, so there’s not much point in you blowing it up, is there?

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