DAVE ROSS

Ross: Why Elon Musk’s Cybertruck might actually be a good idea

Nov 25, 2019, 8:04 AM

Tesla Cybertruck...

The Tesla Cybertruck. (AP Photo/Ringo H.W. Chiu, File)

(AP Photo/Ringo H.W. Chiu, File)

Elon Musk has unveiled his new Tesla pickup, the Cybertruck. Like a Stealth Nighthawk fighter jet without wings. Zero-to 60 in 2.9 seconds.

In the live unveiling last week, Musk introduced a large man to swing a sledgehammer at the spaceship-grade metal door.

“Really wind it up,” he instructed.

It bounced off, and left not a scratch.

“It is literally bulletproof to a nine millimeter handgun,” Musk claimed.

Unfortunately, when the demonstrator smacked the bulletproof windows with a solid metal ball, they shattered.

“Maybe that was a little too hard … it didn’t go through so that’s a plus side,” he hedged.

And of course people were laughing on social media, pointing out that nobody’s going to buy a triangular truck with broken windows.

But you know what? I think a lot of people will, and not because they need to haul cement blocks or floor joists.

They’re going to buy it as a commuter car.  This is the next Hummer – a vehicle whose real purpose is to make everybody else move over.

Anyone seeing a Cybertruck on his tail will exit whether there’s a ramp or not. Anyone who doesn’t just bounces off. And unlike the Hummer, no one can shame you for killing the planet because it plugs in.

Now, even tree-huggers can be intimidating. Oh, people will still hate you for driving the Cybertruck, but remember, the haters have to catch you first. And unless they’re driving Porsches, they can’t.

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