Ross: A Valentine’s Day poem for my valentine
Feb 14, 2019, 6:07 AM
Roses are red, and violets not quite
But that’s not their fault, so I guess it’s all right.
I am writing this card, but not sure I should send it,
Before I come up with a way to defend it.
The struggle I’m having, believe it or not,
Is finding a safe way to tell you … you’re hot.
Now I know that’s presumptuous and out of the blue
But I really don’t know what a guy is s’posed to do
When you have an observance whose very existence
Is meant to encourage an amorous persistence
– A dogged pursuit with your eyes all a-gleam
Of the elusive love that’s been haunting your dreams
The trouble is that, as I hear myself talking –
The love I express sounds a whole lot like STALKING
The stores now have cards that can help me to say
Just how much I’m obsessed – in a non-creepy way
How I’m seeking an evening of candles and booze
Without finding my name on the six o’clock news.
I do not want to ask inappropriately
But there must be a way to get you to ask me.
Perhaps if I say: “I don’t wish to be rude
“But I thought that one evening we two could collude…
“In a modest hotel, on a sort of a date
“Where we might share a drink, and a fancy cheese plate?
“And when I say collude, please don’t let that trouble you
“It’s spelled with a U, and not with a W
“So please let me know and dispel all my fears
“Sincerely—your husband of 45 years.”
-
Tune in to KIRO Newsradio weekdays at 5am for Dave Ross on Seattle's Morning News.
