Ask Ursula: My neighbors’ dogs destroyed my fence and now they’re threatening my son

Hi, I’m Ursula Reutin, co-host of “The Gee and Ursula Show” on KIRO Newsradio. Welcome to “Ask Ursula,” my weekly advice column. 

Dear Ursula,

I have a situation with my neighbors, and I don’t know what to do. Recently, their aggressive dogs chewed through the fence, got into my backyard, and destroyed property. When I went to their door to let them know their dogs were in my backyard, they didn’t answer, so I was forced to call animal control.

Ever since then, I can feel tensions rising. More recently, I overheard one of the neighbors making verbal threats during a phone call, saying that if my son were to stick his hand through the fence, they would unleash their dogs to mutilate him.

The fence needs to be replaced because of the dogs, but I’m hesitant to get it fixed and ask for half of the cost because I know there will be pushback. Since their house is currently for sale, I’m also not sure if I should fix the fence and, if they refuse to pay, take legal action in small claims court or potentially put a lien on the house to make sure I get reimbursed.

The unfortunate thing about this scenario is that I am white and my neighbors are Black, and I feel that if I were to take legal action, or if tensions got worse and an altercation happened, it could be misconstrued as me being racist, which I am not. I judge people on their character, and I have family members who are Black.

At this point, I just want them to sell the house and be gone. I’m even willing to pay the closing costs to get them out. They are horrible neighbors.

Signed,

On the Fence in Puyallup

Dear On the Fence,

Based on what you’re telling me, these don’t sound like responsible neighbors who are willing to control their dogs. And if you heard that phone call accurately, I completely understand why you’re worried about your family’s safety.

I would take race out of this entirely. If you know you would be reacting the same way no matter who lived next door, then don’t let the fear of being called racist keep you from protecting your family or your property.

If you’re worried about your family’s immediate safety, my advice is for you to replace the fence, even if you have to pay for the whole thing yourself. I know that may not feel fair, especially if their dogs caused the damage. But they’re already trying to sell the house, you have a terrible relationship with them, and fighting over half the cost may create even more stress than it’s worth.

You said you’d even be willing to help with their closing costs if it meant getting them out of there faster. Take that money and put it toward a fence that makes you feel safe in your own backyard.

And I would document everything: the damage to the fence, any incidents involving the dogs, your call to animal control, and anything else that happens. Hopefully you never need it, but if this situation gets worse, you’ll be glad you have a record.

At this point, I wouldn’t make this about getting even or getting reimbursed. I’d make it about keeping your family safe, protecting your property, and getting through the next few months until these neighbors move.

Hope this helps!

With love, Ursula

If you need some advice about a work, family, or dating dilemma — or maybe there’s something you’re struggling with, and you need an ear and some guidance — I’m here for you. Reach out to me at askursula@bonneville.com or fill out this form here.

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